The notorious graffiti artist known as Not Me struck again Saturday. While the Haberman family was enjoying a rare sunny afternoon, Not Me returned to the scene of a previous crime to heap more destruction upon a familiar target.
Several months ago, the Haberman family’s Suburban was discovered in the driveway with “rock painting” on the tailgate. Rock painting is a particularly destructive form of graffiti in which the perpetrator, generally around three feet tall, takes a rock and “paints” the vehicle. Saturday afternoon, the owners of the vehicle confirmed that more vandalism had occurred. At the time of the original incident, multiple eye witnesses identified the suspect as Not Me. In an interesting coincidence, the same eye witnesses were present this time as well, and again unanimously confirmed the culprit was Not Me.
Not Me has been linked to several other crimes such as pencil marks on the exterior doors of the Haberman home, rainbow-colored marker smears on the kitchen island, and random neon yellow streaks in surprising locations (including siblings) from a highlighter swiped out of the console of Grandpa’s truck. The Habermans have resorted to keeping all art supplies on top of the refrigerator and prohibiting Sharpies from entering the property. Unfortunately, they are unable to completely remove all the rocks from the premises. A Go Fund Me is being set up for the victims to completely encapsulate their entire outdoor space in concrete.
It is apparent that Not Me has no intention of quitting any time soon. In fact, Not Me’s deviant behavior appears to be escalating. Experts have been working hard at profiling Not Me but have been unable to make an arrest at this time. Observers familiar with Not Me argue that her energy would be better spent doing things like learning how to go potty on the toilet, but so far Not Me disagrees.
This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in the series “Breaking News”.
